You can celebrate the anniversary of your first meeting, the first snowfall, your cat’s birthday, paying off a charge card or cleaning out the garage. Celebrations are fun and help us wake up and notice the good things that happen to us.

Your weekly assignment, should you choose to accept it:

Pick something to celebrate together, and do it today!
 

If you enjoyed this article, Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week will provide you with much more information that I believe will be useful to you.

She includes the suggestion that you ask yourself “What would be one or two small things that my partner and I could do this week that would make us both feel that we are on track to accomplishing our goal?” There are many suggestions of activities you can use posted throughout this blog.

I wish you a New Year filled with joy and connection with the people who are important to you!

More about Laurie Weiss

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[tags]Relationship Advice, Relationships,Special Occasions[/tags]

It usually showed up within a few days after Valentines Day, but she desperately wanted it as a Valentines Day gift.

She had been hinting for weeks. “I love chocolate on Valentines Day.” She had found so many opportunities to remind him that when Valentines Day was coming, that he just couldn’t get it wrong again this year—or could he?

Valentines day came and for the 15th year a row nothing happened. Allison was devastated. However on the day after Valentines Day Steve presented her with a huge box of Valentines candy.

At her next coaching session Allison recounted the sad tale. “Why can’t he get it right? He does know I like candy and he does get it for me. Why can’t he get it for me on Valentines Day?”

After speculating together for a few minutes, Allison decided that Steve’s heart really was in the right place but something was wrong with their communication. She decided that hinting was not working and she needed a new strategy.

One evening after dinner she asked if she could talk with him. She explained how disappointed she was that she did not get her chocolates on Valentines Day.

He was amazed. He explained that he knew she loved chocolate and that the day after Valentines Day all the chocolate was marked down to half price. He could buy her twice as much for the same amount of money if the only waited 24 hours. He had no idea that receiving a gift on Valentines Day was what Allison really wanted most.

She explained that for the 15 years they had known each other, she had been waiting for him to make her Valentines Day romantic by giving her a gift on that day. She had told stories about how romantic it would be to get a Valentines Day gift. She had been dropping hints about gift she wanted to receive and she had been giving him cards, but nothing had happened.

He looked blank. “I never knew you wanted anything until you started telling me about chocolate. As soon as I realized what you wanted I got it for you.” By this time she was in tears. “I can’t believe our communication is so messed up.”

Steve told her, “I can’t read your mind, just tell me what you want and I’ll be glad to do it for you. I just want to be happy. I never knew what I was doing wrong. I guess I just can’t hear hints.”

Allison pleaded, “Next year will you give me chocolate on Valentines Day? And I mean ON Valentines Day!” Steve methodically made a note in this calendar Allison did not ask what it was.

The next year, ON Valentines Day, Allison received a large box of chocolates, a romantic card and a dozen roses. She was ecstatic.

The moral of this story is that mind-reading is an inexact art.

Next time mind-reading is not working for you, try having a conversation in which you state clearly what you want, and be sure that your partner understands you. You may be pleasantly surprised at the result.

(Names have been changed to protect privacy.)

Get your free gift, 24 Tips for Having a Great Relationship and learn about Being Happy Together: How to Create a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week.
[tags]Relationship Advice, Relationships, Communication, Special Occasions[/tags]